Given the challenges facing many in agriculture, now seems like the right time to illustrate a story of a dairy family who overcame greater challenges than most of us will ever face. Daryl and Roxanne Fletcher offer an amazing example of the human spirit shining through business and health challenges. They both grew up dairy farming in Oregon and now live in Wisconsin.
Daryl was farming with his parents in Tillamook after Roxanne had farmed with her parents in the Willamette Valley, where she left when they got married. They thought farming in Tillamook would be forever and hoped to take over the operation. When it became clear that wasn’t going to happen, it was time to do something different.
They moved across the country the week of Thanksgiving 2022. When asked about why they moved, which happened a few years after Roxanne was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, she says, “I can’t explain, I just knew it was the right thing. You have to listen to how you’re being guided.”
It was not an easy move, but their three sons have blossomed — especially the youngest, who has a variety of learning disorders, including ADHD and dyslexia. They found friends, sports, and a great community in the Reedsburg area of Wisconsin — in spite of missing their cows.
Daryl was hired by a dairy farm but then suffered a massive heart attack in the barn on this third day. The hoof trimmer saw him go down in the alley and started CPR, while the herdsman called 911. Both saved Daryl’s life, along with the emergency workers who were nearby.
Daryl was 51 years old when he had a “widowmaker” heart attack — a phrase that refers to a major life-threatening blockage at the beginning of the left main artery. Roxanne later found out that he died five times.
He had high blood pressure for years and had three complete blockages that had to be repaired in the hospital following the heart attack. When their youngest asked Roxanne if dad was going to be OK, she wasn’t sure she’d ever see her husband alive again. She replied, “He’s one of the strongest men I know.”
That strength has been necessary during a long road to recovery; Daryl was just able to return to work midway through 2024. The Fletchers want to encourage all farmers to get their health checked regularly and take preventive measures. They’ve learned to look at food differently through their health journey and are still learning about managing stress. Daryl’s cardiologist, the daughter of a dairy farmer, told him, “You’re going to learn to eat the salad.”
Roxanne points to the bright side.
“Daryl’s heart attack was a gift to the boys because they saw what their life would be like without their dad.”
Daryl now volunteers as an assistant baseball coach and Zamboni driver for the local hockey rink — which he wouldn’t have been able to do while farming.
Imagine facing a mental illness diagnosis, losing your dreams to farm, moving across the country, and suffering a “widowmaker” heart attack in a handful of years. This is the first in a two-part series about a farm family who has done just that and come out on the other side, saying, “A bad day doesn’t mean a bad life.”
It’s a mantra many can learn from. I’ve heard from several farmers who say they don’t know how much longer they can hold on. I’ve watched families struggle to keep a dream alive at the demise of the family. And I’ve seen individuals suffer because they didn’t think there was life after dairy farming.
The Fletchers are a living example of dealing with life altering health challenges — both physical and mental — and coming out stronger on the other side.
Part 2 in this series on the Fletchers will explore Roxanne’s journey with bipolar disorder.
Michele Payn speaks and writes to help the people of agriculture have tough conversations about managing stress, connecting with consumers, and making sense of science. Learn more at causematters.com or follow @mpaynspeaker on social media.
